The Book of Boobs

So Dr. Harrington's assistant leads us into her conference room. On the table is a book, with a box of kleenex on top of it.

"Oh! That's a book of boobs and reconstruction!" I exclaim.

I pick up the book of boobs and start browsing through with Francois. He's flinching, grimacing, and looking away from time to time, as if the glare of scarred breasts and stomaches are blinding him.

No tears though.

"I'm tellin' ya, when I googled images of mastectomies and breast reconstruction back in 2007 I drank a whole bottle of wine all by myself!"

The book of boobs kind of confirms what I've been thinking all along. My body is my body. It's just the way it is. It's great the way it is, and I definitely think of myself as attractive, but I don't have any illustions that I'm going to pull off 25 (or even 35) again, with or without boobs.

I remember when I lost a lot of weight after weaning Paul. I was probably the thinnest I've ever been. Clothed, I received plenty of attention from plenty of people - and that was a good time.

But naked....hmmm....

Here's the image. In Jon Stewart's America book, there's a picture of all of the Supreme Court justices naked.

Sandra Day O'Conner.

Look it up.

Let's just say I could look between my legs and see my butt hanging.

OK...TMI?

It gets better.

Francois and I are going through the book looking for boobs and a torso similar to mine. We both agree on which picture seems to match, and, um, I'm telling you folks, naked torso pictures of women over 40, look, like, uh, naked torso pictures of women over 40. There's a bit of that soft fluffy white fat that likes to congregate around your belly button. There's the warm air and gravity effect, you know, where the nipples on the boob get large and soft, causing the breasts to start pointing pretty much straight down.

Now do you think we should save boobs like these?

Or better yet, imagine those 25 year old boobs pasted on this torso with the pasty, puffy belly fat framing it?

We were both like, yeah, GO FLAT CHEST!!

I'm not going to try to make my lovely body into anything it's not. Except, maybe, a massive swimming and running powerhouse ;-)

SO.... BIG ANNOUNCEMENT!!

The boobs have a REPRIEVE!! There was some problem finding an assistant for the surgery on September 8th so the surgery has been moved to September 15th.